Making a List(en) and Checking it Twice
A lesson about lists. And Listening.
I’ve never been one for to-do lists. As much as I’m a nerd and have tried to make tech - or even pen and paper - I just don’t have the capacity to deal with lists. I have tried every note application ever made and well…they don’t stick with me.
The child on the other hand…LOVES LISTS
Today’s example: It’s June-teenth today which means no school, but because our neighborhood sucks and she had no friends to play with because they are not rotting away like ours is.
She was exhausted after running around at yesterday’s field day so we let her be on the tablet for a good part of the morning (I know, parents of the year) .
But, there is a time when it’s time to get off the tablet and clean your room.
BW asks her to get off the table and clean her room - nothing. no response.
BW asks again and the result is the same. I’ve been watching this mother/daughter dynamic and wondering if I want to step in here or should I just hide and let them sort it out.
BW asks the 3rd time, and I decide I better play good cop here before the other cop loses her mind with the child.
The first thing we do is set a timer. Timers are magic, and it’s much better for all parties to wait five minutes for the tablet watching to be done than spend it getting frustrated wondering if your child is hard of hearing or is just truly ignoring you.
Five minutes are up, and despite a bit of pushback the tablet is pried from her tiny hands.
Let’s call this progress. It’s not much but go with me here. Now that she is out of her tablet coma and we have her attention somewhat BW tells her to go and clean her room because it’s a disaster once again.
Cue the whining and feet stomping and protests: “It’s too hard!”, “I’m still using the stuff on the floor, etc” Pick and excuse, and it was used.
I suggest we make a list of everything that needs to be picked up. The child loves this idea, but with a twist. I go to help/coach with that list and she tells me she can make her own list and I am not needed.
Great. I go drink coffee.
About 10 minutes later, the child comes down - and with a list. I assume it’s the list with all the things that needed to picked up - stinky socks, crayons and the like.
But no. The list read:
Nothing
And that’s it. It took me a bit to realize what she meant. At first glance, I thought this was a protest sign and she was staging her own little “no kings” protest about her bedroom chore but then she showed me her room and it was ALL CLEANED UP!!!
The “nothing” on the list was what remained to be cleaned up. Nothing.
Just when you think you have lost all hope, they throw you a bone just to give you a glimmer of hope you might be an okay parent after all.
Until Next Time,
TH and Co.