Don’t Lick the Wal-Mart Shopping Cart

Because Why Would You?

This weekend while we were inside snowbound we moved some furniture around and moved a desk up to the child’s room so she would have her own space to color and play etc.

The problem was we didn’t have a chair for her. We looked online but didn’t want to spend $100 and up on an office chair because this isn’t needed. Then she told us she wanted us to buy 2 chairs so she and her friend Ethel could play and color together.

Okay then. Cheap folding chairs it is.

I was going to just buy them on Amazon like we do everything else but for some reason the delivery time for the chairs would have been weeks out.

It was decided. We will go and get them at Wal-Mart. We needed chairs today. Also, we needed to get out of the house. If hear one more minute of you tube kids I might go crazy.

It took an hour and a half for the child to decide whether she wanted to come and she played me like a fiddle deciding that fact. It was super cold and windy so I was just fine going by myself and picking up the chairs and then getting out of dodge.

Finally we managed to pee, get a coat on and boots and I got her into the back seat.

We were on our way to Wal-Mart! In the beautiful city of Niagara Falls!

I don’t know about you guys, but Wal-Mart is…..interesting. I remember it being cleaner somehow but maybe it’s just the rose colored memory I have and the awe of seeing both tires for your car and potato chips in the same store.

Now I avoid this store as much as possible. The music is too loud and there’s way to much crap to see. We have too much choice in this country and Walmart is a prime example of this. The checkout had I swear 17 different types of beef jerky on display. Including Teriyaki.

Anyway, Chairs. We found them and the few things we needed and we were at the checkout admiring the beef jerky selection when I look over and the child has her tongue fully out and has it twisted completely around one of the wires on the shopping cart.

“Don’t Lick the Shopping Cart!”, I yelled “What is wrong with you?”

She tucked her tongue back in like a frog catching a fly, and learned one more boundary of life today: Don’t lick the shopping cart!

Lick ice cream, not carts.

The funny thing is I have witnessed this exact same scenario before but it wasn’t my kid. It was a stranger’s kid. This was a few years back and pre-child for us so perhaps it was the universe getting me ready for today.

The same thing happened that day to another parent. There was the lick and then the same statement:

“Don’t Lick the Shopping Cart!”. “What is wrong with you?”

I wonder what goes though a mind of a child where they think that licking a shopping cart is a good idea? I guess I will never know and probably my grandchildren will lick the cart as well.

I guess it’s just the circle of life.

Please remember to return the cart when you’re done.